A lot can be said with words, but a lot more can be said without words. We follow the person that takes initiative. This tends to be the person that takes the word in large groups, the one who might dislike public speaking just as much, but knows that it is needed for the group to move forward. Yet to lead a group time and time again it is not necessary to constantly be doing it with words. Silence can be much more powerfull than speaking.
Let’s take for example a moment that makes someone angry. Eg. You told your best friend a secret and asked them to tell no one about it. Next weekend you meet up with a different friend and they ask you about the secret. You know you only told it one person and they have breached your trust. You can call them and yell at them for 15 minutes straight. The only thing this accomplishes is that they get a headeache and the point does not transfer correctly. If however you meet up with them and calmly but confidently tell them what you think about it, it will have much better results. Especially if no matter what happens you don’t end up getting yourself winded up.
Silence is better than unmeaning words. – Pythagoras
Trying to get your point across aggressively only makes you look like a fool and someone who lost his temper. When you are yelling you show you are not happy with it, but you will also show weakness. You think that if you aren’t yelling they will not listen to you. However the opposite is true. When you are being loud about it you tell them you are not confident enough that you can bring over the message without increasing your sound.
Our lifes are filled with plenty of meaningless words and activities. There is no need to fall in the same pitfall by trying to fill in a void by just talking about anything. Get used to silence and thrive in it. Stop putting music in your ears all the time and find peace with silence. This will help you and show a lot of confidence in difficult situations. Think about your last exam you were waiting to start, waiting for your turn for a presentation or waiting for the job interview to start. This are all intense moments that are really stressfull. If you can come up with internal peace at this important situations you will show your strength. You will stand out in a world where everyone is addicted to sound and activity.