Think about how things feel for others

How often do you think about others?

Other people might be acting strange or different from everyone else. This is no reason to look at them differently, we never know their complete story what happened and what they had to go through.

People have different backgrounds and environments, so what seems harmless to you might have a bad memory for someone else. Instead of laughing at them or not understanding why they react differently try to acknowledge that everyone is different and everyone has different needs. For example your child could hate school, while you know that school is very important for them to learn. What is the reason that they hate school? Maybe they are too smart for the class they are in and would they prefer to move up a year to stay challenged, maybe they are being bullied in school. Instead of focussing on the negative try to find the reason and search for a solution.

Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use. – Emily Post

It’s straightforward if we solely think about ourselves and neglect the feelings of others. Trying to figure out the reason why someone is reacting a certain way can be difficult, yet very rewarding for everyone. For example someone may not be willing to speak a different language. It could be that they are able to speak the language but someone has laughed at them while speaking the language. When you try to ask or understand for the reasonings behind a certain reaction you well get to know the person better and you are able to help them.

When you place yourself in someone’s shoes you can attempt to understand what they had to go through. An example is if you are preparing a presentation with your classmate they might not be willing to do a lot of talking during the presentation. Giving presentations is a skill that is difficult to master and is highly dependant on our previous experiences with it. If you notice the other is nervous and doesn’t want to contribute extensively it might be because they dislike giving presentations. If you are less stressed about it you can agree that they put more work in the preparation and you talk a bit longer during the presentation. A different method to solve this problem is that you let them decide what part they want to talk about, so you can take on the more difficult part. From the moment you are aware of the issue you can work together to find a solution.